Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Should You Flaunt It, If You Got It?

Kim Kardashian is the hot topic at the moment due to another nude picture posted on her Instagram. There is a huge debate going on with many people all over social media. The biggest question I have seen was "Why"? She's successful, has a a wealthy husband and 3 kids. This is normal for Kim,  but after her Robbery in Paris she took a break from social media while little sister Kylie became the hottest out the crew.  Kim is obviously a beautiful  woman. Only a hater would deny that. Just because you got it,  does that mean you should flaunt it? 

Look I am all for women's empowerment. I believe women should love themselves inside and out.  You don't need to flaunt it to feel good about yourself,  but some do like the attention of others to make them feel validated and important. 

We live in a time where in 2050 our grandchildren will be able to see a lot more than they would anticipate. There will be twerk videos, drunken snap chats for our grand kids to look back on.  Right now we are just living it up, without thinking about that. 

Women who put themselves out there are always labeled as a hoe.  It's been a stigma that really annoys me.  If a woman does it she's a hoe,  if a man does it he's sexy. Should you flaunt your body if that's what you want?  Yes and No.  What you do is your battle  especially if you are a married woman.  What you do is a representation of your man. So if you know that posting your bare ass online could upset your man,  flaunting it may not be a good idea.  Most men like to feel like their woman only belongs to them.  So me being a woman I can't imagine a man seeing his wife naked to tell you what it feels like. In Kim Kardashian case lots of people feel he doesn't really care much. Personally most men will go off if their girl left the house braless. 

So because you have a big butt,  nice boobs,  and flat tummy should a woman have the right to flaunt it any and everywhere?  Would you do it? 

Saturday, January 27, 2018

Colorism : When Being Black Is More Than A Ethnic Group

You would think in 2018 we would be a lot more aware.  Sadly I realized for myself that not every black person are actually Africans or African American. I came across a gorgeous dark skin Latina name Amara La Negra on the premiere season of Love & Hip hop Miami. I for the 1st time heard the term "Afro Latina." I had no idea that there were Latinas who were dark skin but weren't African. Sounds insane, but there are lots of others who had no clue. Did we not know,  or are we finally starting to listen?

 Amara La Negra who is 100% Latina had to provide pictures of herself and parents to shut down haters who accused her of darkening her skin.

The term colorism has also been going around due to Amara story on Love & Hip Hop Miami.  Racism &, Colorism are two different things that I think some people think are the same. Yes similar, but different.

"Colorism" are discriminatory acts against people based on the color of their skin.. For example brown skin. 
"Racism" is being prejudiced for your racial status.. For example African American. 
"Afro Latina Says Identifying As Just Latina is Anti-Black"

There are other ethic groups whos race is black, but it doesn't mean they're actually African Americans. Afro Latinas are more known in Haiti, Dominican Republic, Cuba, and Puerto Rico. This may explain the lack of knowing here in the U. S.  Normally when you see a black person you automatically think they're African American.  When it comes to Afro Latinas most have said their own culture are responsible for putting one another down. The traditional Latinas looks like Jennifer Lopez.

Dravidian's also come in different shades, mostly living in southern parts of India. The people up north India have fairer skin and are descendants of Aryans.

Being Indian and dark skin has its own challenges. It depends on the type of family you have. I read a article where one young lady talked about her aunt and uncle suggested skin lighting cream for her. She eventually let it get to her and started using bleaching creams. For a young child being told you should use skin lightning cream is something that will tear any womans self esteem down. 

South Asians deal with a lot of negativity from family members and peers all because of their darker skin too. Whiter skin is looked highly upon in some Asian countries. In Thailand tourists have noticed the whiter your skin is,  the better you were treated. In some Asian countries, darker skin is considered to be poor. Insane right?  Unfortunately in their eyes it isn't racism, it's what their culture standards have showed them. 

Racism is real and hurtful for me just being African American. What my peers fail to notice is colorism in our own culture. 

Colorism also exists in the black community. Many African Americans don't talk much about it, but it exists. Light skin vs dark skin.  The light skin girls in the urban communities were always considered more beautiful than the dark skin girls. It's not true, both are equally beautiful. For some men their idea of beauty is what they see in the rap videos. Long hair,  red bone. 

Back during slavery, "House Negros" was a term white slave owners used to describe lighter African Americans. They were considered to be more beautiful, and smarter just because their skin pigment was closer to theirs. It made some lighter skin slaves think they were better than the "Field Negros" who did hard labor in the yard. To keep it real,  in reality everybody was slaves with no damn freedom. So who wins? 

I am glad this topic was a big discussion and still is. We confuse racism a lot with colorism. Yes they both are wrong.  No one should be judged or mistreated due to their skin color or ethic group. I hope you enjoyed this post.  If you have any stories please contact me.  I am open to learn and hear your stories. 

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Kayla Got The 411 Podcast :Episode 8- Dear Ex,

NASA Removed What "Would've Been" 1st African American Astronaut Jeanette Epps Off Upcoming Spaceflight

Jeanette Jo Epps is an Engineer and NASA Astronaut

Strangely without reason Jeanette Epps was booted off a mission to be a crew member on the international space station. Sis would of made history in becoming the 1st African American woman astronaut to actually serve a long term stay on the international space station. 

NASA made a announcement this past Thursday they were taking Jeanette off the mission and replacing her with this woman
Serena Auñón-Chancellor

Now normally when this happens there is a reason behind it.  But in this case NASA
has not gave a reasoning behind it. Serena Auñón-Chancellor was actually Jeannette Epps backup. All NASA stated was she would be returning to NASA’s Johnson Space Centre in Houston to assume duties in the office and would be considered for future assignments.

We don't know as of yet why they reassigned her. But we do know Jeanette dreams are crushed. She dreamed of one day walking in space and now her dreams are no longer happening in June of 2018.

Inquiring minds want to know... 

@NASA we need answers.  Is it because she's sick,  not qualified or because she would if been the 1st African American woman to actually live on the international space station? This woman seemed as if she was ready, and qualified. Let's stay tuned for a reason. I'm not going to say why I really think they reassigned her but I'll wait on their explanation first. 

Monday, January 15, 2018


On April 4, 1964 on my mothers 11th birthday, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr was assassinated while standing on a balcony outside his second-floor room at the Lorraine Motel in Memphis, Tennessee. She recalls being so young at the time but remember hearing it on the radio broadcast that he was shot and killed.  She recalls everyone in the neighborhood going outside and destroying all the business and rioting. Not only in Augusta, Georgia but all over the world. People were angry, upset, felt hopeless. 

Dr Martin Luther King gave black folks hope that one day blacks and whites could go to school together, and shop together. 54 years later a lot of our parents and grandparents who aren't living would be proud to see the progress and everything he went through made a difference. We are still dealing with racism, and injustice today, but because of the strength, and bravery Martin Luther King Jr had,  it's the reason I and yourself reading this can live in a country and have equal rights.  So today we take the time to honor a man who gave up a wife, and family to make this country a better place.  R. I. P We Love You. 

"Thank you Dr Martin Luther King Jr for all you have done for us.  There has been progress and much more needed but thank you for giving us hope.  #MLK" 💙

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Wack Sex: Stay Or Go?

The most annoying feeling for a woman is laying next to a guy after bad sex.  Bad sex doesn't always mean the sex itself was bad.  Leaving a woman feeling unsatisfied is also bad sex.  It's like going to a new restaurant that looked great on the outside, but once you got there and tried the food it wasn't all that. It was BLAH!

Men don't realize that bad sex for a woman is the biggest deal breaker. Size is not always the issue. Let's keep it real girls,  a lot of grown ass men don't know their own strokes and movements. They think because they are big in size that's all is needed.  The same way they put effort into getting meat out of crab legs, put the same effort into your woman during sex. From most women I have spoken to,  the number one problem is ..

Women are soft, and gentle naturally. Sex is all about the anticipation. Foreplay is cool if that's what you're into.  Kissing, licking, sucking are all some key things guys can do to lead into sex. Make her want it by teasing her. Their major problem is no patience. They want to dive in, get their nut and go to sleep. All in 1-5 mins while you're laying their unsatisfied feeling used and unwanted.

Men think women are like jack rabbits who want to go on and on all night. I have even heard the line, "You'll just lay there." They're so one sided to understand the length of sex is not the problem.  Them not fulfilling their sexual duties by making sure their woman is satisfied is the issue.
I remember in my last relationship he would wake up the next morning confused as to why I was so upset. Had the nerves to say "I know you not mad about last night?" Of course after satisfying him and 3 mins in he gets what he needed and falls into a deep coma of sleep after wards, I would be pissed off.

 It got to the point I was so turned off by it I hit my ex up the day after.  At least he knew and understood my body. That was a deal breaker for me.  So what your sex is good, but if 80% of the time you're selfish and inconsiderate to her needs it's not worth it.

So the big question is...

Sex is a big cause for break-ups and infidelity in relationships.  People we who aren't satisfied tend to wander off. Most people don't like to admit it,  but I will.  Sex is very important in relationships. So if you decide to stay talk to your guy about your desires.  A lot of your men don't even know you're not sexually satisfied, because you don't talk to them.

Thursday, January 4, 2018

Are You Willing To Give Sugar For A Sugar Daddy (Must Read) 👀

Take Poll 1st

Would You Be A Sugar Baby For A Sugar Daddy?

Yes, spoil me!
I already am 😉
No way, I value myself.
Please Specify:
Survey Maker

When I say sugar daddy I don't mean the candy sis I mean that old man who's probably old enough to be your dad.  If you're really messy,  he may be old enough to be your granddad. A sugar daddy is pretty much a older man who lavishes someone younger with gifts,  and money only if she does something strange for a little piece of change. Not all the time but majority.

 I an not a sugar baby.  Personally Ive  had a few old men try to recruit me. If we really gone keep it real,  I have thought about it especially during my college days. I even made a account on one of those websites, one in particular SeekingArrangement.com
I SURE DID GURLLL.  When I got a message from one of my teachers from middle school trying to recruit me,  I knew it was time to deactivate.  

What I realized for me personally I am not fake enough to act interested in a sugardaddy. Plus most sugar daddies love submissive women. If you're opinionated, bossy, and demanding he can't tolalerate you. He doesn't want a baby who's gone talk back. Most sugar babies don't find their sugar daddies attractive, they find his pockets more attractive. A lot of them play along to get what they need from him. They don't love your old ass. 

Truthfully I don't look down on girls who have sugar daddies. I'm open and understand why they choose to do so. Even if I personally would not. In my eyes I look at it as desperate times call for desperate measures.  She must really be going through a hard time to tolerate it. 

Most studies show that college women between ages 18-25 are normally the sugar baby age group.  Think about it?  You're in college, on your own trying to pay for books,  and tuition. From experience college is hard and a lot of life responsibilities come with it. Chipotle cashier or sugar baby?  Some sugar daddies just want the attention and company of a young woman.  Then the other majority wants pleasure. The girls look at it as easy money and gifts. All they have to do is please him.  Sometimes it's also a low self esteem thing.  Feeling as if they are not good enough and wanted, but this older man comes along to give them better.  Let's not act as if the men don't do it for their own insecure reasons.  Using money, and gifts to bribe beautiful young women into being with you. 

Most chicks I know who have sugar daddies never fully admit to being sexual active with him.  They always say he's just nice like that. In my mind I'm thinking.... 

Not many men no matter how old and desperate they are will spend money and buy gifts and lavish vacations and get nothing out the deal.  It's like a business deal.  You do for me, I do for you. Men have been doing it for years, and women are now doing it to men.  Telling people you have a sugar daddy is also embarrassing. That's something I feel you need to keep to yourself. Just make sure someone knows who he is just in case he's a insane person and your life is in danger. Truthfully most sugar daddies have a wife and kids hidden off somewhere in the suburbs, so sis your secret is good with him.  But I have heard of these situations turning out bad. 

I watched this documentary on the life of sugar babies and dealing with sugar daddies before writing this.  . 

 In 2014 there was a kick-start program for a documentary called Daddies Who Date Babies. (sounds creepy right).  But it must have never been created. I came across a tumbler page  for it of people telling their stories and how dangerous it can also be. 
 I quote one story from a commenter. 
Just remember to be careful. Your life is your choice.  I don't condone being someones sugar baby but I don't judge people on it.  I want all us girls to work hard, be independent.  Reality is real life happens and some have to survive.  Please be careful.  Remember that leading men on can be dangerous. If they are buying you gifts, taking you on dates ask yourself what will they want from you?  Be smart,  be safe .