Upgrade Your Standards!

Baby let me upgrade you? No I think we as women should upgrade our standards. Life is all about growth. So grow your taste in men as well. Now for young girls in their teens may not understand what upgrading your standards are. For one they are still living with their parents watching Disney and eating hot Cheetos as lunch. When you are 16 you are lucky to even date a guy who has his driver license. You aren't 16 any more babe. Those standards you had for yourself at 16 should not be the same when you are 25 and up. You are a grown ass woman now. Bills, responsibilities and things going in life. You have upgraded in life so the men you date should not be any different.

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• A man who has a job is very important. He should have some source of income. Unless he was born rich he needs to be able to file his taxes at the end of the year. The main reason we need a man who has a career is because it is not our job to take care grown men. Dating a rich man is not realistic but he needs to be independent. He should be able to pay his own bills, and have his own gas money, That's if he has a car. 

• It is understandable that everyone can't afford a car, but you are not a Uber. You can not always be his Lyft when he is in need of a ride. If he doesn't have a car he should be hopefully looking for one, unless he can afford to pay for a driver. Trust me, those date nights when you're the designated driver who has to get in your vehicle, and use our gas to pick him up, will become tiring. My mom once told me years ago, if there is a emergency and you need help in the middle of the night, he should be able to get in his car to come help you. The bus doesn't run after midnight.

• Then you have the "Couch Crasher." If he is always sleeping at his fellas house, or his family members homes, that is a serious downgrade, He needs to have his own place that he can call home. Once he gets comfortable with you, he will be bringing a suitcase full of his items to your house and he will never leave. Ha! (That was hilarious) As grown women we don't have time for kiddie games. Dinner at his house and dinner at your house is how its suppose to be. Or consider privacy. Room mates are cool, for the moment, not a lifetime.

• You are a woman, so as women those little boy antics are for little girls. If a man wants to get to know us, or meet up he should be inviting us for coffee or a date. Netflix and chill is cool if that's all you want from him. In the dating world the impression you give him is what he is going to have. You can't meet him and invite him over to have sex, but a week later you tell him he needs to take you on a date. Excuse me b****? That is going to be his response if he's a savage. We should be wanting a man with goals, and respect for himself and us as women, He knows what he wants and won't waste our time. Upgrade your standards is so important. We have to know our worth and stop settling. It is okay to tell him "You're Are Not For Me."  Grown men are already on that type of mentality . You are not a gold digger for upgrading your standards. You are a woman who wants to be treated like a grown woman and not a little girl. 

Hope you enjoyed this post. Repost, email, or tag a friend who needs to read this and upgrade her standards when it comes to dating. Oh and don't forget to subscribe. Check out more great post below.

Check Out My Feature Post For #GirlsTalkLondon "Are Sidechicks Winning"

HATE THAT YOU LOVE HIM

Love is truly like a drug. To fall in love is a amazing feeling. To get butterflies just by receiving a text from your man. But the most common thing is to love and hate someone at the same time. You hate that you can't stop loving them. It feels so good but feels so wrong. You may have told him you hate him so much, don't call you anymore, and to play in traffic. Or maybe that's just me lol. Still the thought of them leaving your life would be heart breaking. Girl nothing is wrong with you. As women we are just crazy as hell.

I hate that I love you is a real feeling. You hate that person for the hurt that they caused you. However laying in bed at night not having them kills you. You want them but then again you don't want to ever see them again. Listen you are not crazy. True love just doesn't die. You can curse him out, yell, send him mean texts, yet when he actually leaves you alone, your world crashes.

As women we are slightly indecisive. We say we don't want him, but get mad when he moves on. As women you are allowed to change your mind. Be mindful he may be tired of it and actually not come back. Do you like being with him more than being apart from him? Make a decision if you want to work it out. Do you hate the flaws in the relationship more than the great times? Fight for what you want. Life is short, if its meant to be it will be. Yes you hate his childish ways, selfishness or etc, but love the nice things he do for you, and always there when you need him. Think about it, and figure it out. Listen to my favorite song to help you think about it. 

Are Side Chicks Winning? (MUST READ)

Lately side chicks are a new trend for men, besides rompers lol. It's a big topic in the media but also a big topic in the communities. From fight videos trending of the main chick fighting with the side chick. Side chicks are bragging about being a side chick. It's like they have their own society. 

Remember there use to be a time when Mistresses were ashamed to admit they were dealing with a taken man. They knew they were a slut but if anyone knew it too it was a embarrassment. Think of the biggest side chick scandal.  

Monica Lewinsky admitted she had sexual encounters with President Bill Clinton on 9 occasions and even admitted Hillary Clinton was at the white house during some of those moments. To actually admit, yes I knew he was married, and yes it was under the same roof as the wife.

But today in 2017 men want themselves a side chick. Rapper Lil Boosie had the nerves to say “Now I do be respecting the women who go back to they men. I like that. See the girl who went back to they man. Waka Flocka old lady. See I respect that. All these people leaving and doing all of this and she go back to her man. Cause she know it’s bigger than that man. It’s a home; it’s a family. I respect women who take they men back after they cheat,” said Boosie.

Men find that inspirational to cheat with a side piece and come home and have a home cooked meal by their main chick at home. Who is normally the one who holds them down, makes sacrifices and all. Also to even think that his main girl should be okay with it because she is supposedly his number 1. Really?

So it goes back to my question. Are side chicks winning? They get gifts, money, trips and less drama because they are not his number 1. He gets what he wants from her and she gets what she wants from him. 

But......

Truth is, being a voluntarily side chick is not winning. By voluntarily meaning you know he has a woman but you don't care. Lets keep it real sometimes you can be a side chick and not even be aware you are one, because men can lie so well. Side chicks you are losing, To allow yourself to be number 2 in anything, and accept that , babe you can never win. To lay down with a man knowing he has a woman that says a lot about that person. You lose them how you attract them. Side chicks find any excuse to clarify why they do what they do. "Oh they not together LIKE THAT" or SHES NEVER AROUND' or "HE DON'T LOVE HER ANYMORE."But why even involve yourself in that? So no side chicks aren't winning in my opinion. Because you will always be known as the woman who allows anything. Lastly side chicks always end up having to deal with another side chick. 

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Jordan Edwards: 15yrs old, Black, Unarmed, Killed By Police(Read More)

R.I.P Jordan 🙏💔

Jordan Edwards,"ANOTHER" unarmed black boy who was 15 yrs old was shot and killed by a police officer while leaving a party. Police tried to lie & say 

that the car that Jordan was in reversed "aggressively," and the officer shot because of that. Then later the police chief said that video evidence showed the exact opposite, and that the officer's actions "did not meet their core values." So they fired the officer. Okay we need a conviction too. Pretty much if it wasnt footage they would of lied. I mean why do  they fear black men that much you shoot 1st & ask questions after. 

Step Your Cookies Up!!!

I know this post is misleading. "Step your cookies up before they crumble, was a line from Nicki Minaj Mix tape. I know some tolerate situations out of love. But you cannot allow a man to get by, get by and get by. If he needs to step his sh*t up, tell him. Keep reading.......

Allot of men need to be told "step your shit up".  There is nothing wrong ladies with telling your man to step it up and be a man, and do better. If he is someone you love and see a future with he needs to get it together. If he doesn't, you have to see the worth in yourself and let him go.

There are men who want to still party every weekend, or don't want to work, or be a better man for you. Do you really want to have to tell him daily he needs to get it together? How annoying is that? We as women can only support and love a man so much before we crumble trying to save his ass. I always say it is a parents job to build confidence and self love within a child. Because you may end up with a grown ass man who needs to be taken care of.

Support your man, but don't let your life crumble trying to save his life. 💯

#OOTD

Make Up Sex ? Or I Miss You Sex?

Arguments happen in relationships. It is totally normal for you and your significant other to have fights. The subject of make up sex or I miss you sex was a topic between co workers and I today. It was very interesting hearing others opinions on this topic. Before I jump into this topic take my quiz now below. Then keep reading.

Make Up Sex Or I Miss You Sex?

Make up sex, having a big blow up then making up with sex is the best I can't decide! Sex is just amazing period.

Yasss, I miss you sex. The feeling of anticipation of seeing them. Other Please Specify:

Poll Maker

Make up sex is so passionate. After breaking up, and reuniting its a way to take out your sexual frustrations on each other. Whether its a big argument you and your man had or even break up, sometimes makeup sex can squash the beef. Have you ever been so mad at your man, then you two have rough passionate sex and all of a sudden you aren't mad anymore? You two just made up. But don't depend on makeup sex to fix problems in your relationship. Make sure you later talk about what and why both of you were upset anyways. I noticed in a previous relationship the makeup sex distracted me on major things that needed to be addressed. So enjoy it, do your thing girl but don't let it distract you.

I miss you sex is my favorite. I miss you sex is very emotional, and meaningful. You may have broken up, and months or years went by and you have always missed the other person. I look at I miss you sex as a way of showing your man how you truly feel. It feels like a spark all over your body because you had been waiting for them and yearning their touch. I miss you sex could also be a eye opener of what you thought you missed, but realize you really don't.

Either way always make sure you use protection when having sexual intercourse. Sex is a amazing experience to share with your partner, but always practice safe sex. Hope you enjoy my poll. Share with friends.

Fu*k Fake Friends. Where Are Your Real Friends?

Unless you are in high school there is no need to be figuring out fake friends. Real friends have your best interest at heart. Fake friends don't give a damn what you do, where you go, or about you as a person. bet when its time to turn up and hit the streets they are there, right?

Real friends are a reflection of you. If you want to be someone in life, have goals, and accomplish them, your friends should be motivation or understand those things. Real friends will pick up the phone for you at 2 a.m if you had a fight with your boyfriend. Real friends care. A down ass friend wants to see you succeed in life and wants to see both of you succeed together. As a good friend, by seeing blessings for them, it brings joy to you. Keep positive people in your life. If you hang with negativity you too will be just like them, NOTHING.

Fake friends have different meanings but not that damn different. Cake is Cake, Fake is Fake, you get it?  Fake friends don't care about their friends goals, dreams, heartache, or struggles. Fake friends use you for what they need you for. You may have tried to tell a friend about somethings you are working on career wise, and they totally show no interest. Think about it? If they don't got shit going on in their life, you really think they care about yours?

Fake friends don't ask how you've been, or if you need anything. Friends look out for one another, if they don't have your back, watch your back.

As adults the fake friends start to expose themselves. But for teens and college students this is the beginning. A lot of people you thought you would be bff may change. But look at it as spring cleaning. Everything you don't need anymore, or clutters your life, Trash It!!!!!

Not The Right Time

You know that saying, "If its meant to be, it will be". Its 100% true. If you love someone, and they love you it will come together. If it doesn't it just means they weren't the one. If people love you they will fight for you. The main thing women ask for is their man to fight for them. Prove you love her, and want her. Chasing and fighting for someones heart is two different things.

Breakups can be easy, or hard. If its easy, that shows you they were not that special to you anyways. But if months, and years go by and no matter and you still wonder how they are doing, or are okay that tells you allot. But one thing I can say ladies. A mans role is to lead, protect, provide. The most you can do is tell him how you feel. The rest is up to him. If its worth it, it will be. If it isn't wait for love again. A love that sticks like super glue, and doesn't come apart. ❤

Also check out this cool app http://sharepop.co/ff1758

Rapper T.I & Tiny & Alledged Sidechick

⏯ PRESS PLAY 😳

I swear. This T.I & Tiny @majorgirl & "allegedly"  side chick @realberniceburgos shit is a mess. She done posted this snap 23 hrs ago taunting Tiny, Rapper T.I wife. ☣☣☣☣Public service annoucement. If you gone be a sidechick. Have some (SIDECHICK ETIQUETTE) 😂😂 Be polite about it

This woman Bernice is a model. She is very beautiful. It is believed she is rapper T.I sidechick. She has denied it but Tiny has pretty much confirmed it by telling her ass off. I mean. Why wont they both stop dealing with him. Wouldnt that be smart.

Janet Jackson 3rd Divorce Over?

I ❤ Janet....but some are calling her Janet The Scammer. Done got her baby from this man and said Bye 😂. Janet has always expressed love for kids. Being 50 just having supposedly her 1st child I'm sure was a blessing. But 3 months after the birth of her Son, rumor of divorce from husband. 

Now Janet announced her pregnancy to @people a few months back and had the baby in Jan/17. She married Qatari Wissam Al Mana a multi-millionaire in 2012. One of their fake friends told @dailymail "Sadly, Janet and Wissam have decided that it wasn’t working and to go their separate ways". 🤔 Either Janet just wanted her a baby or their religion, and family views got in the way, he is Islam. Lets see what her rep says 1st. He worth 800 mil. She picked the right baby daddy.

It has been rumors she has converted to Islam because of being seen wearing a head scarf. This is just a rumor but daily mail are known to have facts true. 

Janet has been married 2x before. She married James DeBarge in 1984 but that didn't last and theres been rumors about a secret baby. Then she married a back up singer name Rene Elizondo. They say threes the lucky number. I hope this is true. I always hope for love for Janet, Halle, JLO and Mariah. They just always have bad luck in love.

Im Just Saying You Can Do Better

Do you ever look back on past relationships and think, "Damn I could of did better"? You just know you deserve so much more and better. I can not count how many women go through this when dealing with a guy she no longer wants

Sometimes we stay because we don't know exactly how and what to say. You can't just say " I can do better than you." Or maybe you can.

Its your heart, you have to look out for yourself. Truth is, no one will have your best interest more than yourself.

Oh so you aren't happy? Leave that relationship. Nothing irks me more than a motherfucker staying in a relationship they are not happy in. Release yourself. Yes they may be mad, but oh well as long as you are happy.

Your partners sex isn't great? Leave. If you are going to spend your entire life with a person, make sure their sex is A1.

No goals, no ambition. If you feel like they are not doing anything with their life you have to move on to better. Be with a person you can grow with. Not a person who takes you backwards. You are suppose to grow. Don't let no more hold you back. Its okay to think you can do better. You know what you want, so go for it.

101 Love- Loving Who You Are

How can you truly love someone if you don't love yourself. Love & Happiness all begins within. You have to truly love the person you see in the mirror everyday. Life can be hard and confusing for people who don't know who the hell they are. 

There are allot of people who put down others on a daily because they aren't happy with who they are. The main people yelling "I'M THE SHIT" are the main ones unhappy in life and lost. You can't be the shit if you are constantly change yourself to get approval from others.

In relationships we women want a man to love us with all their heart. But how can you expect, or want love if you don't love yourself. If you don't love yourself how can you be mad at him for not loving a person who don't even love themselves. Real recognize real. Love recognize love as well. 

Get to know yourself, learn what you are good at. Figure out your favorite face feature.  Those little things matter and helps to build confidence. You can not wait for somebody to tell you how beautiful you are. Tell yourself everyday how damn sexy you are. Once you learn to love yourself you will learn to know your worth and what you deserve in life.

Kendrick Lamar- The Heart Part 4

Damn Kendrick Lamar 👀 This was dope. He switched beats, flows. I never been a hardcore fan. But I give credit where its needed. My question is I wonder who he talking about🤔.
 You think 🔥 or ❌. Listen to full song below.

What A Girl Wants

What a girl wants? That's like a million dollar question for men. One they can't get right. Men over think themselves trying to figure us out. I will point out some of the major things we women want from our man. It really is bothering me how unhappy allot of women are. Men have to realize the number one thing a woman wants is to be Happy. 

Being in a relationship you aren't happy in is miserable. Love is important but happiness is a big part of love. A girl wants to smile every time she sees her man. A girl wants to get chills every time her man touches her, and not get annoyed and angry every time he comes around. If a woman is not happy a real man should do his best to find out why and fix things. If he does all he can and she still isn't happy at least he can say he gave it his all.

Society has painted the picture where a man should protect and provide for his woman. In 2017 women are bosses and doing for themselves. But that doesn't mean she wants a man with no car who she has to drive around. Or a man who cant keep a job. If she loses her job or become sick a woman wants to feel like her man will have her back. Stability in a man should be a goal when dating men. Allot of women sadly don't have this. Trust me every woman wants a man with his shit together.

Respect goes back to "treat me how you want to be treated". Men are really getting disrespectful. Anything that will hurt her or embarrass her is disrespectful. A woman's pride and self esteem could be torn ed down by the disrespect of a man. When it comes to respecting a woman that means talking to her like a lady. Putting her feelings in consideration. Lastly always putting her 1st. Never have another chick laughing at your girl because you in the streets as if you're single.

A girl wants a man who studies her body. Pleasing your woman sexually is key in a relationship. Women just want their man to please them, and treat their bodies like its theirs. 

Nothing is sexier than a man who has life goals. Who wants a bum ass guy with no goals, no life plans or future. A woman seeing her man try to accomplish his goals or become better is inspiring.

Women want to hear it from her man and not someone else.  Honesty is what women crave. Nothing hurts women more than a lie. Be honest with her is all we want. Truth hurts, hut lies hurt worse.

Us girls never want to feel like he gives 0 fucks about us. Want to feel important to our man. We want to feel like he cares. Whether its returning her calls or texts, asking how our day was. Little things add up to show us we are important.

I don't know not one woman who enjoys being cheated on. Who wants to share their man? I would hope no one. We women just want to be the only woman in our relationship with our guy. Keeping their 🍆 in their pants shouldn't be a difficult wish.

Lurking !!!! When Is It Necessary?

Sometimes you end up on one persons page, then see somebody you know and go to their page, then another and another. Yes darling, you are a lurker. Don't trip it happens to all of us. But lurking isn't such a bad thing. For a woman who is mysterious about her mans activity you may want to lurk. Now I know there are some who believe"WHATS DONE IN THE DARK WILL COME TO LIGHT" Well I believe "If you think it, believe it, and look into it"

I have been cheated on before like allot of other good women. But because of my woman's intuition and smartness I listen to my gut and look into niggas.

Quick story. 

A few months back I was talking to a guy who seemed like he was digging me. He swore he was different not like the rest. God fearing, ambitious, good independent man, I thought. I told my best friend about him she was so happy that damn I may have found a good man. But I said to her "girl something not right". I kept saying it and she thought I was tripping and letting my past mess this up. So I followed my gut. After LURKING, I came across his ex, who I found out he had another woman in their shared home and that was the reason they broke up. After a few mins of lurking each week I came across a girl who was the reason for his last break up and was actually his girlfriend now. Yasss! He sweared he was different, and wouldn't lie, and cared. Bullshit right? 

Don't be the crazy chick going through his wallet, but if you think his ass up to something. Lurk and you may find resolution to the truth. Check out these 4 signs you need to take on the role of a detective and look into your partner. There is nothing worse than those women who are married 20 yrs and find out their man was creeping for the last 10 yrs 💀. I mean people leave clues like rat leaves crumbs. Dint stalk no damn body. But look into it if you think something. Previous Post "WOMANS INTUITION"

Kiss & Tell "What We Are Telling Our Friends"

When it comes to men a women we tell secrets in different ways. Men normally tell a woman's business to brag on themselves. With women we normally tell a guys business as humor to our friends. Lets face it, men.and women Kiss and Tell. Let me break it down for you.

1. Locker room gossip. When men gossip about you ladies in the gym locker room its to make him seem like the cool guy. This says allot about him. The only way he feels to fit in is by telling sex stories about you. Fuck boy activity.
2. Men who really care about you will brag about you. By accident they may reveal personal things about you. For example you and your guy sex life may be great, and he may mention the great sex to his homies not thinking its your business too. Now every time his homies come around guess what they are thinking lol.
3. Men are big on gossip about a woman's bad hygiene. If a man encounters bad breath, or smell vagina, trust he is spilling the beans. 

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1. With us women we find daily humor in group chat gossip. If you send a penis picture to a woman, I can almost bet it will end up in a group chat. 9x out of 10 its because she thinks your penis is small. Think about it, why would you want to share a big one with your friends, its yours. 😂
2. If a woman is in a big fight over text, trust she is forwarding the conversation to her friends. Relationships are suppose to be private right? Not when shes fighting with you. 
3. Bad dates are a big kiss and tell. If you don't pay, or show up late all of your business will be in the streets. With women news travels fast. 

Is it right to do...yeah maybe not. But its what both sexes do. Now you have a better idea of what your guy or girl may be telling.

Oscars Best Dressed

@janellemonae @violadavis & Emma Stone Yasssss Boo. Everybody slayed tonights #oscars . This is the 1st award show in a while where there were more best dressed than worse. Beautiful Ladies

Black Women Who Empowered( Dr. Mae Jemison)

It is black history month. Not many people pay tribute to the ones who made a difference for us blacks especially the women. Each week I will be paying homage to a black woman in history who empowered us and who is a strong black woman. Check out my 1st week pick.

Dr. Mae C. Jemison

Mae. C Jemison who is a Libra like myself, was the first black female astronaut. In 1992 she added another historic title by becoming the first black woman to go to space. She flew into space with six other astronauts aboard the Endeavour on mission STS47. When she was a little girl in Chicago she spent most of her free time at her school library reading many science books, especially astronomy books. She had a passion, and interest for space itself.


After highschool she received a Bachelors of Science in chemical engineering in 1977.
After she decided to get her M.D at Cornell University Medical College she later in 1985 decided to do a career change and do what she always inspired to do since she was a young girl.
 In that year, she applied to NASA's astronaut training program. The process was delayed, but she didnt give up, she reapplyed the following  year and was 1 of 15 candidates chosen from a group of about 2,000. 1987 she was finally choosen and it made her the first black female astronaut with the job title of a science mission specialist which she was responsible for conducting any crew related scientific experiments on the space shuttles.

When Jemison finally flew into space on September 12, 1992 she made lots of young black girls proud and gave us hope. She was in space for eight days along with six other astronauts. Her task was to conduct experiments on the weightlessness and motion sickness on the crew and herself. They returned on September 20, 1992. She later left the astronaut corps in 1993, and begin teaching fellowship at Dartmouth. She also established the Jemison Group which her company seeks research, develop and market advanced technologies.

Mae Jemison is one of many black women who have empowered women, inspired and motivated us. It shows if you work hard you can do and be anything you put your mind to. She is my first pick for "Black Women Who Empowered.

Know Your Worth

With Valentines day approaching, their are allot of girls who are going to be last min plans. I'm here to tell you, KNOW YOUR WORTH.

• For one, you shouldn't have to wonder if he likes you. Dealing with guys who sometimes calls you, sometimes asks you out is a sign to end that. Why should you settle for that. A guy who wants you will go out of his way to show you.

• Second, don't allow him to make you uncomfortable. Flirting with girls, liking big booty models pictures on instagram is disrespectful. Him telling you "its just for fun" is bullshit. Know your worth, be with a guy who only has eyes for you.

• Men who abuse you physically, or verbally is never right. Know that your happiness is very important. People who love you will know that and wont hurt you. Ask yourself what is it about you that is special? Write it down. After ask yourself does he deserve someone with those qualities.

Knowing your worth is all about self love. You have to see how great you are to fully know what you deserve.